Stop, Squat, and Run

I looked at Tenant A with my jaw about touching the floor and she said, “…and it’s still lying out front because I wanted you to see it.


Where I work, the term “Juicy” is most often used to describe gossip.  The kind of gossip that will ruffle feathers and has the potential to start a war.

On one such occasion, I received a phone call from a tenant that usually keeps to herself and tries to avoid problems.  She let me know that for the past week, the person that lived across the road from her was spreading rumors implicating a lot of the community of conspiring against her.  She called to let me know that if that person came to me talking about everyone else that I shouldn’t believe everything that she says.  We will call the person calling Tenant A, and the person causing problems Tenant B.

At this point, I was not fully sure of what was going on but I knew that as time went by I would hear the whole story.

Just then, the phone rang again for me.  It was Tenant B calling to speak with me.  I answered the phone and sure enough, she called to let me in on the “Juicy” events that were taking place around the community.

Tenant B let me know that Tenant A, along with Tenant C and Tenant D, were talking about her while they drank tea and coffee every morning on Tenant A’s front porch.  She let me know that she could hear them whisper about her.  She also let me know that she had spoken to a few other tenants and they verified that those 3 were saying that she was abusing prescriptions and that she was not healthy.  This infuriated her and she wanted me to step in.

I scratched my head and let her know that these were unsubstantiated rumors.  I let her know that she should just ignore them, ignore the supposed comments, and move on with her life.

She didn’t like my response very much.  She told me that it was on my head what happened next because she was not going to put up with it.  She hung up and I heard nothing else from her.

A few days past and Tenant A called to speak with me.  She told me that ever since the commotion in the community started a few weeks ago she decided to install a camera facing her front porch.  She spoke with the local law enforcement and they assured her that just so long as no other front doors were being video taped it was legal.  She asked me to come by her home today and watch some footage.  She warned me – before I entered her yard to watch my step.

I showed up and we began to watch the footage from the night before.  It was about 3:30 am on the video and into the frame walks a figure to the yard of Tenant A.  The footage shows this person or individual pulling down their pants, squatting down, and doing their business on the front lawn.  They swiftly pull up their trousers and run away.  In what direction?  Straight across the street.  Its hard to tell the face or any descriptive details from the dark video but the deed that they did do was unmistakable.  I looked at Tenant A with my jaw about touching the floor and she said, “…and it’s still lying out front because I wanted you to see it.  I told you this was a juicy one.”

Source: Juicy